Tuesday, August 30, 2011

Oooo...A New Quote!

"Everyone who got to where they are had to begin where they were." ~ Richard Paul Evans


I have no idea who Richard Paul Evans is, honestly.  But BOY...he sure got this one right!  And it was a message I needed to hear pretty badly tonight. 

I tend to look at people who are farther along on the journey than I am and think that they have some special mojo I'm missing or that they've always been strong, healthy, fit people.  But that's just not right.  They had to begin where they were.  Just like I did.  The difference between us is where I was when I began my journey.  And the person responsible for that is me.

But in changing who I am...what I value...my routines and activities...I've also made it a certainty that I will NEVER be where I was again. 

No, I'm not where I will be.  I'm not where I want to be.  But PRAISE GOD...I'M NOT WHERE I WAS!  I have more than begun this journey...I am successfully navigating it.  I'm not perfect...nor will I ever be.  I don't make the best choices every day. But I'm better.  Better Every Day!

Who Calls You Pretty?

I have a friend...a very good friend...who has been such an encourager on this journey.  He may not know it...but he really has had a very big impact on me as I've been changing things in my life.  Even when I hadn't yet lost much weight, he consistently let me know that he could see the difference and that I was looking good.  Words like "amazing" and "pretty" could be heard in our conversations on a routine basis. He also let me know that even if I'd never lost any weight, he'd still consider me both of those things. 

This friend happens to have known me for a very long time and knows the person I am inside...knew me before I was a big girl and had the same opinion of me then as he does now. I can tell you, when he says that he thinks I'm pretty, I believe him.  He knows me well.  For him, it's not just what I look like...it's who I am on the inside that really matters.  And it means so much to me to know that he feels that way.  It's been such a source of support while I've been making these big lifestyle changes.

Saturday, August 27, 2011

Doing What We Don't Want To Do...

Don't you wish it was this easy?!?!
"I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do." (Romans 7:15)

Truer words were NEVER spoken, right?!?!  At least I've got to confess that they're true in MY life!  Often, I know what the right decisions to make are regarding my spiritual, physical, mental, and emotional health.  But for some reason, I don't always make those choices.  I head down the other path and end up paying the consequences...some of which are pretty costly!  I'm guessing that I'm not alone in this.  So why do we do it?  I've been thinking a lot about that lately.  Here's what I've come up with.  Feel free to add to the conversation!

Thursday, August 25, 2011

Are You Telling Your Story?

One of my favorite bloggers and someone I follow on Twitter is Rich Kirkpatrick (@rkweblog).  He's a worship leader out in California, and though I've never met him in person, I feel like I know him because he's pretty transparent in what he writes and tweets about his life.  Because his honesty and straightforward approach bless me, his example is a goal I strive for in my own blog. Well, he tweeted something this morning that really got me thinking.

"Your life is a story that needs telling."

I originally got started blogging about this journey to health and wellness I'm on because I had ten members of my family and core of friends suggest it to me within the same week.  I figured God was trying to get my attention about something at that point with so many people bombarding me with the request and perhaps I ought to listen.  When I started this blog at the end of June, I had no idea how it would go. But I'm sure God did.  I'm absolutely positive in fact.

Because here's what I've discovered while on this journey.  Rich is right!  Your life IS a story...and it DOES need to be told!

Unfinished?? Unwilling!!

If you're anything like me, you may have a closet in your house that no one gets to see.  And in that closet, you may hide the multitude of craft projects that you started but never finished.   If I got brave enough and let you look in mine, you'd see skeins of yarn for the baby afghan I began crocheting but never finished.  You'd see squares cut and pieced for the quilt I began but never finished.  You'd even see a dress pattern pinned to fabric and cut apart but not stitched together because it was never finished.  Are you seeing the trend here?  I tend to start a lot of things...yet I seem to finish very few!  Whether its books I'm reading (or writing!) or craft projects or even housecleaning (a half-cleaned half-bath isn't really cleaned at all, btw!)...unfinished tends to be pretty typical in my life.

Tuesday, August 23, 2011

It's Not About What We FEEL...

...it's about what we KNOW and BELIEVE! 

I wrote a Facebook post earlier today that indicated that I just wasn't feeling it today.  What I meant by that was that I felt attacked emotionally, physically, and even intellectually a little bit.  I had a big presentation at work today that I was nervous about.  I'm still struggling with my knees taking 2 steps forward and 1 step back, along with a summer cold that has me sneezing and stuffed up.  And there are so many other things attacking my emotions that I can't even list them all here!  Just "not feeling it".

And that phrase is true.  My FEELINGS were out of whack today.  But you know what?  What I FEEL isn't what's REAL.  Not always.  There are things that are true, whether I feel them or not.  The big key for me is to not make decisions based how I FEEL, but rather based on what I KNOW.

Example:  This afternoon when I got home, I almost broke out the bag of peanut M&M's for a pig-out session.  Drowning feelings in food is a habit I've indulged for many more years than I'd like to admit.  But I stopped myself.  My new habits are serving me well.  Rather than going with what I felt this afternoon (M&M's will make me happy)...I went with what I knew (I'm not hungry and I'm not eating any M&M's).

This is why I've now lost 82 pounds...and it's why I'll lose all the rest of the weight I need to lose, too.  Discipline yourselves, my friends, and THINK before you make decisions.  Don't let your emotions rule these kinds of choices...they can't always be counted upon!

Monday, August 22, 2011

Habits Can Be Very, Very Good...

So, it was back to work today!  It's been awhile since had to do my "regular" schedule of workouts, and I wondered how it would go for me as I transitioned back to school.  Add to that the pool which I would normally visit on Monday mornings before work had a furlough day today to save the county money, and I was a bit more concerned than I might have been!

You will be happy to know that I managed to do the good, healthy things that I needed to do...regardless of the fear I had that I wouldn't be able to get back into routine easily.  I began the day with a mile walk around the neighborhood near my school.  I drove there early with the specific intention of doing this aerobic workout since I couldn't swim today.  I ended up setting a personal best time on that mile...16:30!  A full minute better than anything I've ever done on the treadmill...and then some!  Then I ate small portions at the delicious staff breakfast catered by our administrators for the staff.  I drank all of the water I needed to drink during the day, ate a healthy lunch, and then worked out this evening with Angie. 

Saturday, August 20, 2011

Ever Wonder What 80 Pounds Looks Like???

Me, too!  So I did some looking around, and here's what I discovered...

80 pounds is equal to...

Friday, August 19, 2011

Getting Ready for Work...

This week is tax-free shopping in Maryland in case you live here and might have forgotten that. I intentionally waited until this week to buy a few more things to add to my wardrobe so that I have clothes to wear to work that don't have to be held together with office supplies!  I mean, that was fun and all...but really...don't want to have that same issue this year!  You can only pull that look off a few times before people start looking at you funny!

You may remember that a friend of mine really paid it forward when she gave me the wardrobe she's shrunk out of.  The great thing is, it's mostly work clothes, too!  However, a lot of them are more late fall/winter weight clothes...which is going to be great in a few months.  But not so good for the more immediate future (Monday!) when it's going to be about 95 degrees outside!  So I wanted to add a few more pieces to the wardrobe that would get me through the warm weather for as long as it lasts.  Not too many pieces, mind you...I AM still shrinking, after all!!!

Today was actually a shopping trip I was looking forward to...and that hasn't happened in a long time! Since I discovered last week that my shirt size has shrunk down to normal-size clothes in the Misses section, I was excited to see how close my pants size was to that.  What I discovered is that I'm not quite there yet...but I'm pretty close.  I feel like a pear...smaller on the top than on the bottom!  But you know what...considering that the top is 4 sizes smaller than my biggest and the pants are 3 sizes smaller...I'll take it...ANY DAY!

Now that I'm going back to work, I'm looking forward to being able to mark milestones like this one with my new class.  One of the most powerful things for me last year was being able to use this journey and all the milestones along the way to show my students that you really can do ANYTHING when you commit yourself and your energy and resources to achieving your goals.  It was a great opportunity to be able to share my failures with them as well as my successes...to show them by example how you get yourself turned back around and going in the right direction again.  Those are some incredible lessons to be able to teach 10 year olds...the kind that I pray they'll remember their whole life!

And sharing them with you has been great, too!  I try to be as transparent and open as I can in this blog with the hope that God blesses YOU as you follow my journey... just as much as He blesses me with your support and encouragement along the way!  Thanks for building yourselves into my life!  And thanks for taking this journey with me!

Thursday, August 18, 2011

Inside of Me...

...there's a thin girl trying to get out. But I can usually quiet her with chocolate!  

I'm betting you've heard that joke before.  I know I have.  And I've laughed.  I Googled it tonight to see who it's attributed to and give credit where it's due, but no one seems to claim it.  (There are also some raunchier forms of the joke, as well as different foods substituted on the end...but that's really not the point here!)

The point is this.  I realized tonight that I used to live that way.  Maybe not intentionally.  But I sure did.  I was struggling earlier tonight.  I didn't want to go to the gym.  There were some bad storms rolling through here.  My tummy hasn't been feeling too good.  And this silly cold that I caught sometime yesterday has me hacking up a lung about every 30 minutes or so.  All excuses, I know.  And I ALMOST let them keep me home.  I almost didn't listen to the thin girl inside of me who was screaming, "Get your butt to the gym, Angie!"

The absurdity of what I was doing hit me on the drive home from dinner.  I was talking to my husband and telling him that I thought I'd just walk on our treadmill in the basement instead of going back out in the bad weather, especially since I didn't really feel all that well anyway.  When I said those words aloud to him, though, I just knew that they weren't right. Deep inside me, I knew.  I could say all I want that I was going to get on the treadmill in the basement.  The fact of the matter is, I know I wouldn't have.  It's been down there for YEARS and I seldom do.  I would have made another excuse for not getting on it tonight if I had chosen to stay home.  I know I would have...there's no sense in even trying to deny it!

So instead of allowing myself to talk myself out of going to the gym, I talked myself right back into it...out loud!  I totally changed the conversation we were having. (My husband just shakes his head at me sometimes when I do things like this!)  I reminded myself that I don't have the luxury of skipping gym nights.  Not yet.  I'm only half way to where I want to be and now is not the time to start rationalizing why I'm not going to work out.  Now is the time to go to the gym and work my tail off! 

And then, I did it!  When I got in the front door, I went straight upstairs and changed my clothes into my workout clothes.  Then I got myself back in my car and headed straight for the gym!

The Old Angie would have let the thin girl inside her be quieted, be it with food or with television or with reading or with time on the computer...any of several diversions would have worked for her!  This new me has absolutely NO intention of ever letting herself be placated by chocolate again.  It's just not gonna happen!

Wednesday, August 17, 2011

Never Judge a Book By Its Cover? It's Not That Simple...

I've been doing a lot of thinking since yesterday's post.  Thank you to those who lent me their wisdom.  It truly helped me to hear your opinions and input.  Here's what I've been thinking...

Over the many years that I've spent as a large woman, I have conditioned myself to pay very little attention to my physical appearance.  I've always tried to make myself look as good as possible by having a nice hairstyle and learning how to apply make-up in a flattering way.  But I never truly considered myself attractive.  Carrying around 200 extra pounds robs you of more than your physical health; it also steals your self esteem.  I've discovered, though, that it also alters how you view the world - well, at least it did for me. 

Tuesday, August 16, 2011

People Notice...

I saw a lot of people today that I haven't seen in a while. I was mentoring the new teachers in our school system and got the chance to see some of my friends who work in other buildings who were also there to mentor the new hires.  During a regular school year, we have little opportunity to engage with one another other than by email, so even though some of them knew about this journey I've been on for 16 months now, many of them hadn't actually seen me.  I heard some great feedback today from my colleagues about my progress on this journey!  It was actually a really nice feeling to be complimented on my hard work.  One of my colleagues that I haven't seen in about 2 years, though, really stunned me.  She said she didn't even recognize me!  She and I taught in the same building for 7 years.  It's not like she didn't know what I looked like...but she had to look really hard to realize it actually was ME standing in front of her.

Monday, August 15, 2011

Back in the Water...

Well, I got back in the water today...no real heavy aerobic workout...no real stress on the knee...but being in the water at all was AMAZING!  It felt like I was getting my journey back on the right track again.

Since I couldn't do a lot to raise my heart rate, I focused on strength moves, like the one in this picture.  I was really impacted by the whole idea of not letting what I can't do interfere with what I can do, and I made that work for me today.  I couldn't run in the water...wasn't given permission to do so just yet.  But I could walk.  I could tone, I could strengthen.  And so I did.  I did some in the water stretching, balancing, and leg lifting to build up the muscles that surround my knee.  Because my knee doesn't work well, these muscles become even more important to develop so that they can bear the load my knees don't. 

I just want to encourage you.  Today was nothing spectacular, just another step along the path to being fit and healthy.  But it would be so easy to just skip workouts like today..and I want to encourage you not to do that.  These little, seemingly insignificant steps really do add up along the way.  They pay off big time in helping you achieve your goals.

Sunday, August 14, 2011

The RIGHT time to do the RIGHT thing...

...is RIGHT NOW!  

As much as I love motivational quotes, I wish I could claim that as my own.  But I can't.  It belongs to one of the most inspiring people I've ever had the privilege to hear speak.  His name is Steven Furtick, and if you've never heard him, you need to.  Seriously.  Because what he speaks is TRUTH and it resonates as such in the deepest parts of who you are.  Google him and find that out for yourself!

This week, I had a survey on my site that 11 different people answered.  I asked which weight loss tips have been most helpful to you.  Pretty generic question, I thought.  I included as the answer choices several of the most recommended weight loss tips that the medical community advocates, with a body of research behind them supporting their success.  And the results of the survey showed pretty much what I figured it would.  More than half of those who responded said that portion/calorie control, increased exercise, and drinking more water are the things that most help them when they work at losing weight.

So here's my question...if we KNOW the right things to do...WHEN are we going to do them?  

My friends, this is not rocket science.  This is not difficult.  It's not.  It's straight forward, simple...and we KNOW the right things to do! We (and I mean ME!) just make excuses for not doing them! 

We don't have time to exercise.  We don't like to drink water.  We're still hungry when the plate isn't filled to overflowing.  There's no time to pack a lunch, so I'll buy some fast food today.  Sweet tea is made with water...it can't be that different, right?  WRONG!

I am sad to say that it took me nearly 25 years to make the decision that enough was enough, that it was time to limit my calories, control my portion sizes, drink more water, and exercise.  How long is it going to take you?

The right time to do the right thing is right NOW.  Make today your new beginning!  You won't regret it, I promise!

Saturday, August 13, 2011

The Victory Was Showing Up...

The Patrick Family after their first 5K
I'm dedicating this blog post to some of my good friends...Bryan and Amy Patrick and Erin Branham.  Today was the big day...the River Valley Run...the first 5K for Bryan and Amy! It was an incredibly motivating and inspiring thing for me to be there with them today and watch them all run this race.  I'd love to tell you that they received medals or some other public recognition for their monumental accomplishments, but they didn't.  They still won, though. 
The victory was showing up...ready to race, ready to compete, ready to finish!

Friday, August 12, 2011

Anyone Got a Shovel???

I had the opportunity to volunteer at the Global Leadership Summit yesterday and today.  There have already been some amazing speakers and I look forward to hearing a few more today, too.  But the last one yesterday, Steven Furtick, pastor of Elevation Church in Charlotte, NC, had a word that I really needed to hear.  (Funny how that always seems to happen when you really tune in to what God's doing in your life...but I digress!)

What he spoke about was the prophet Elisha.  It hadn't rained for a long time, the people were dying of thirst, and the kings summoned him to inquire of the Lord on their behalf.  What he told the kings to do was to dig ditches...to fill the desert with ditches to collect rain water...even though there were no rain clouds visible.  Steven described this as AUDACIOUS FAITH...having faith that God will act and is in control, even when I can't see the immediate evidence of it in my situation.  And friends...after chewing and digesting this message overnight, I've decided that this is how I need to walk on this journey to the new me!

Right now, I don't see how my knee pain is going to get better any time soon...but I believe it will.
Right now, I can't imagine how I'm going to lose the rest of the weight I need to lose without working out hard...but I believe I will.
Right now, I am scared about what going back to work in a few weeks is going to mean for my knee pain...but I believe God can handle it.

The next step in this audacious faith is to ACT on my beliefs...dig the ditches! So, what can I do today that shows I have absolute faith that I will be a strong, healthy person one day?  Well...that's what I'm going to figure out.  I'm guessing it has a lot to do with keeping on marching on this journey, despite having little reason to hope for less knee pain right now.  Keep on working out as much as I can.  Keep on eating healthy meals.  I'm thinking that new quote I found from John Wooden comes into play, too...not letting what I can't do interfere with what I CAN do today.

So, who's got a shovel?  I've got some ditches to dig today!  Are you gonna join me?  Dig some of your own...have AUDACIOUS FAITH today!!!

Thursday, August 11, 2011

Moving Forward...

"Don't let what you cannot do interfere with what you can do." ~ John Wooden


Tonight was workout night for me. Only it was really only an arms workout and stretching for me. Too much pain and inflammation in my knee for me to be on the treadmill or the bike for now. And really, I was very frustrated by this. My first 5K is looming large on the horizon and I feel like I'm not going to be ready.

When I got home tonight after the gym, I was surfing around online and came across this quote by John Wooden, legendary former UCLA Men's Basketball coach. He's a highly quotable guy if you're into collecting quotes like I am. I hadn't seen this one before and it really spoke to me...and convicted me about how I've been acting.

You see, I almost didn't go workout tonight. I knew I wasn't going to be allowed on the treadmill or bike and it felt like a waste of time to show up and not even sweat! But this quote helps me put this in proper perspective. I have been letting what I CAN'T do right now interfere with what I CAN still do. I've seen stretching and weight training as less important and worthy as a workout than the cardio workout that I get from walking and cycling. But right now, it's actually MORE important...because right now, it's what I CAN do!

Moving forward during this flare up of my arthritis means doing what I can to rehab the knee, decrease the inflammation, and strengthen the surrounding leg muscles to support the knee. My journey is not on hold right now, though, simply because I can't use my knee effectively. It will only be stalled if I allow the setback to interfere with what I can still do in the gym. So, I'm making the choice that I won't.

Listen to Coach Wooden, my friends. Moving forward is about doing what you CAN do...and letting nothing stand in the way of that...especially the things you can't do!

Wednesday, August 10, 2011

Yeah, BABY!!!

My NEW SIZE!!!
Yeah...pretty happy!
So, when you need a new plain black shirt to volunteer at an event...and you're in Kohl's... and you get brave enough to leave the big girl's section and walk right next door to the normal-sized girl's section...sometimes good things happen!!!

That's right, people...you are looking at the first clothes that I have purchased from anywhere but the "Women's" section of a department store in about 25 years is my guess!!! 

This is a size XL...NO NUMBERS IN FRONT OF IT!!!!  And from the "MISSES" section of Kohl's!!!  YES! YES! YES! YES!!!!!!!!!  Not all victories are on the scale or in the gym!  And this one feels  SOOOOOOO GOOD!!!!!!!

Tuesday, August 9, 2011

Regrouping...

Today was a time to regroup...to revise the plan for reaching my goals.  Sometimes you just have to do that, I've discovered.  With the flare up of my arthritis in the left knee and no real idea of when it might ease up...although it is getting a bit better with therapy and time...I have to get back to workouts.  They are just different than what I'm used to and focusing on different aspects of my fitness.  I'm working on strengthening and toning several muscle groups right now, rather than doing heavy cardio workouts.  The knee just won't allow me to work hard enough to raise my heart rate.  Not yet.

Initially, this felt like a big setback to me. But what I'm coming to realize is that there's more than one way to reach my goals.  This flare up is really just an opportunity for me to be more creative in how I get there!  So here's what I'm doing...

  • STRETCHING...STRETCHING...and more STRETCHING!!!  Not only does this feel good, but it is necessary to help my knees continue to be functional.  Therefore, I'm doing it.  A lot!
  • Low intensity walking or biking...my current directions from Angie are no more than a 5/10 on the pain scale.  I am very familiar with what this feels like and when I hit this level, I stop.  Period.  I can push through pain that is less than a 5, but for now, I can't push past it.
  • Strength training...remember, muscle burns more calories than fat does while doing absolutely nothing.  Angie already taught us that lesson!  So I'm focusing on building more muscles.  That's what all those ab crunches are about.  My abdominal muscles are SCREAMING at me right now...but they're strengthening!  And having my body work for me rather than against me in burning calories is a great thing.
Regrouping isn't a dirty word.  It's a necessary response to circumstances that are beyond your control. It's actually a very healthy thing to do. 

Monday, August 8, 2011

Today's B.E.D...

Hey!  I can do that!!!
I finally got to go back to the gym today...but not to the treadmill or the bike.  Not yet.  May get to test out this knee tomorrow if Angie says it's OK.  I've learned to trust her...she's always, ALWAYS got my best interest in mind, even when she tells me no!  So, since I couldn't get the knee moving, it was a struggle to decide what my "Better Every Day" was going to be today.  Until I remembered...crunching my abs has no impact on my knees!  And thus the decision was made!

The picture to the right over there is one of the types of ab crunch machines that the gym I go to uses.  It's actually the only one I've been on thus far, and it can really work out your abs, trust me!  The way you do this is to first raise your feet and anchor them. Then, with your hands on the handlebars, use your abdominal muscles to pull yourself up.  The bench you lay on is actually hinged and meant to bend.  It supports you, but it doesn't work for you.  Your abs actually do all the hard work on this one...and after several days of this, I can tell you...I really DO have abs! Amazing!

This was my B.E.D. today.  Previously, the highest number of crunches I'd done in one workout was 226.  But if you wanna beat me on this machine, you're now gonna have to work a bit harder to do so.

Today I did 300.

Come on...try and take me!  I dare ya!  :-)

Sunday, August 7, 2011

Gut Check...

One day soon...!
Are you familiar with the term "gut check"?  I am...and I tend to have a lot of opportunities to engage in them!  For me, gut checking is taking stock of my life and character to make sure that the way I'm living matches the words I say, the things I claim to believe.  In other words am I walking the walk...or just talking the talk.  And this morning is a gut check moment for me.

I weigh myself every day.  We've talked about that in older blog posts.  I use the scale as a tool...not a source of torment.  I know it doesn't work for everyone, but it really does work for me.  I don't mind getting on the scale lately, because mostly, it's been going down.  But not this week.  It went up.

Saturday, August 6, 2011

These Tips Work For Me...

Since I couldn't do too much exercise this week, I had to really focus on eating well so that I didn't gain too much weight.  What I've discovered about my body is that BOTH of those things are necessary for me to continue losing weight.  If I eat well, but don't exercise much, I can usually maintain my weight.  I've never lost weight doing that.  This week, however, it couldn't be helped because of my knee situation, so I tried to make the best of it.  (I guess we'll find out how I did tomorrow morning at the weekly weigh-in report!)

So, since I had to really watch what I ate this week, I thought I'd share a few more tips that I've learned about eating over the past year or so.
  • Use a smaller plate.  When I do this, I put a whole lot less on the plate and yet my mind thinks it's full.  Tricking myself?  You bet...but it works!
  • Don't deny yourself the foods you "love".  Just give yourself much smaller portions of them...and less often.  Sometimes you've just gotta have bacon, ya know?!?!
  • Drink lots of water.  Nothing new, I know.  Hard to do for sure.  But it works.  Not only is it good for your overall health (great skin when you drink enough water, btw!), but it fills your tummy and you tend to eat less because of it.
  • Sugar Free Jello is amazing.  Seriously.  If you're a jello fan, you really have a difficult time tasting the difference between this and regular jello.  And it's 10 calories per cup.  Seriously.  10 calories.  Really...that's amazing!

Again...these things work for me.  I hope they might help you, too...but there's really no accounting for how bodies differ from each other.  I certainly tried many, many things that worked for my friends that never worked for me!

I think the important thing with these tips or any others is just to DO SOMETHING.  If you keep on trying, you'll find what works for you, just like I did.

Friday, August 5, 2011

Just a Slight Speed Bump...

...that's really all this small setback in the journey to a New Angie is! 

Got some great news from the orthopedist today.  The left knee, while significantly arthritic and kinda messed up big time, is not beyond hope!  The current plan is to use cortisone injections every 4-6 months as needed to manage the pain, and to change the anti-inflammatory I  was using because it appears that it is no longer effective for me after being on it for an extended period of time.  The doc seems to think that this will decrease the pain to the point I was before this flare up, or possibly even better.  In short, in a few days, I'll be back in the gym, working my tail off...literally!

Thursday, August 4, 2011

Nervous? Me, too...

Tomorrow is the day.  The BIG day.  I'm going back to my orthopedic doc.  I'm going to get some new x rays and see how much more degeneration has happened in my knee joints and determine if anything that can be fixed by something other than a knee replacement is going on in my left knee.  And I'm nervous.  Very!

My nerves are upset for a few reasons.  After all, this IS the doc that suggested I might prefer to ride a motorized scooter to deal with the pain!  But really, that one comment triggered perhaps the most comprehensive and overwhelming change in my life to this point, so I probably should thank him when I see him tomorrow!

The main reason I'm nervous is the thought that perhaps he's going to tell me there is nothing that can be done and I'm going to have to find a way to just deal with the knee pain.  I don't want to have daily knee pain until I'm older and have lost the rest of the weight I need to lose in order for the knee replacement I will have one day to be successful.  If that's the case, working out is going to be difficult...painful.  And I'm not looking forward to that.

But you know what?  There's no sense borrowing trouble.  Knowledge is power.  I believe that.  Time to live it! Time to go find out what's up with this knee so I can move forward.

And you know what else?  NOTHING that I hear from him tomorrow changes my goals or the fact that I WILL reach them.  I might have to change the plan for how to achieve those goals, but you mark my word...I WILL reach those goals!

So, keep me in your prayers tomorrow, please.  I'll let you know what I find out...

Wednesday, August 3, 2011

How Do You REALLY See Yourself???

I'm feeling a little introspective today...I'm warning you in advance.  But I do believe that this conversation is important, and it's really where I am right now in my journey.  So in the spirit of full disclosure and honesty...which I've committed to on this blog, I think we're gonna go here!  So buckle up and hang on tight, my friends!

<----That picture over there...it's one of my favorites of me.  It's from about 15 months ago, and it shows me at what is probably my highest weight.  (I mark that as 328 pounds, even though I guess it could have been higher and I just didn't measure it!)  But let me tell you honestly what I see when I look at that picture.  I see a great smile...and some killer shades!  I see one of my favorite tops...cobalt blue is a great color for just about everyone.  I see a happy lady...who was getting ready to turn 43...who just bought a SWEET new car and was enjoying a tremendously warm mid-spring day with the top down on her convertible.  That view of myself, however, took me a long time to get to.  I haven't always been that kind to me.  Not at all.

Tuesday, August 2, 2011

An Easy Tip to Try...

Yeah...I don't eat the veggies!
I've got a habit that I've developed over the past several months that really is a tip that could help you with portion control and calorie intake daily.  When I get a plate of food, especially in a restaurant, I divide it in half...literally separate it on the plate.  I'll eat half of it first (or as much of the half as I want) and then wait 5 minutes with no fork in my hand.  I let my body decide if its still hungry or not.  Many times, I have found that just letting myself wait those 5 minutes without eating, I can feel the fullness in my stomach, so I'll take home the other half of the meal.  Sometimes, though, especially in restaurants that use more "normal" size portions, I'm still not full after the half I ate, so I'll eat the other half (or as much of it as I want).

So, I'm calling you out...I'm challenging you!  The next time you eat a meal...try this!  In fact, try it for at least one meal a day for a full week.  See if this makes a difference for you, too!  I bet you lose some weight that week, whether you exercise or not!  This is a great way to allow your body to understand what "full" feels like...and it's a terrific way to eat less calories on any given day!  TRY IT!!!!  And then tell me how it works for you!

Monday, August 1, 2011

Don't Usually Post Twice In a Day, But....

...this is something I think is worth it!  I wrote this note on my Facebook Notes page in mid-April, right before my birthday...way before I started my blog. (In fact, one person who read it at the time suggested that I start a blog then...but that came later!)  This post deals with something that some of my friends (and faithful readers!) are really struggling with today in particular...it's about having a change of mindset and habits...and not making anymore excuses for not doing so. 

So for those ladies...and for whoever else may benefit from this... here's my heart!  I'm praying for you and hoping that you'll find the girl you used to be is SO GONE...SOON!!!!

"Big Picture" Moment...

One thing I've noticed in this journey to wellness I'm on is that sometimes I get so caught up in the day to day things I'm doing to improve my life that I forget that every once in a while it's good to take a look at the big picture, too.  My visit to the doctor today did that for me.  Actually...SHE did that for me!  She pointed out something I may have missed had she not made mention of it.

As of today, I've lost a almost a QUARTER of my body weight.  Yup..25%.  Whoa.  Does that shock you as much as it did me?

I must admit, I'm a bit stunned.  I hadn't really thought about how much of myself would be gone percentage-wise when I reach my final goal.  I know that in about 15 more pounds, I'll be halfway there...but I have always been focused on the number of pounds I need to lose and have already lost.  I never thought about the percent of me that is now missing!  A quarter of my body...gone!  WOW!!  Even better, when I'm done, my body will be 57.3% smaller than when I weighed 328 pounds.  I'm almost halfway there!!!


Now THAT'S some motivation to keep going! In your own journey, look for the motivation you need to get going...and keep going!

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